HELLO AND WELCOME TO THE CRAPPY SUCKITUDE FABULOUS WONDERMENTS THAT IS MY SPECIAL FEATURES JOURNAL. This journal contains the Speshul Features, trivia, deleted scenes and suchlike for Chapters 11 through 13 of City Traffic Puzzle, Book 1 in the Both Syllables Series.



Chapter 11 http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4326397/11/City_Traffic_Puzzle

~~~Songs~~~

City Traffic Puzzle, once again. XD http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iU80D3guRKU

~~~References~~~

"Kate Johnson, sir," he reported in a deep voice. "Saw her with my own eyes."

"The one that got away, how very nice," he mused. "Two birds with one stone..."

"By the way, boss, that's-"

"Not her real name. I know. It's not her only alias, either."

Kila's habit of not using her real name is sort of a homage to King of the Hill's Dale Gribble Rusty Shackleford. :|

Suddenly Andi came running in, gasping. She threw herself down at her console.

"Sorry- I'm late," she panted. "Robot- bees."

Invader Zim reference. X3 Just random.

"Since you weren't here for the briefing, Miss Torrance," Rick said, "we're dropping May off on Tradeworld. She has a solo mission today."

The name 'Torrance' is taken from none other than MR. JACK TORRANCE. >D

~~~Deleted Scenes~~~

Originally, XR really did meet up with the guy at Serdik's and he really wasn't working for Marian. This affected the rest of the story, up until the ending.

12:43 PM

Inside Serdik's it was warm and bright. A little too warm and a little too bright. Also, really crowded and loud.
XR looked around the room. There was the guy, over there in the corner. He made his way over there and sat down.
The guy raised one eyebrow at him. "Finally."
XR flashed him an ingratiating grin.
"I hear you have a business proposition for me," the guy said, picking up a glass of water and swishing it around.
XR nodded. "Yeah. Uh... I have a little... problem I need taken care of," he said, wringing his hands. The ingratiating grin stayed firmly in place.
"To the tune of?..." the guy said.
"Uhhh..." he said. This was a tricky point, requiring much careful consideration "How much do you want?"
The guy's mouth twitched in what may have been a smile and XR's own smile went flat. Really, he didn't feel much like smiling...
"Hey, guys. What'll it be today?"
XR jumped about six inches, yelping and clutching at his chest. It was just the waitress. Golly.
"I'll have a Sclurf steak and Scotch on the rocks," the guy said. XR gave the waitress an ingratiating grin (huh, that grin'd been getting a lot of use the past fifteen minutes or so) and said "Oh, nothing for me, thanks."
She nodded cheerfully and spun away.
XR slumped back in his seat, trying to get comfortable. It was a lost cause, he decided.
"We were discussing my fee," the guy said smoothly.
"Oh. Yeah. Uh... how much do you want?" XR said, wanting this to be over.
"Fifty thousand Unibucks."
The very same amount that got him into this. Oh ho ho. The irony was not lost on XR.
"Sure it is," he said, folding his arms over his chest and raising one eyebrow. "Shuuuuure it is."
The guy gave him a weird look.
"Done," XR said with a nod. "And when do you want me to pay you?"
"Within a week."
His nervous indigestion got marginally worse.
"Fine."
Looks like you're playing poker for your life Thursday.
But wait. Winning 50,000 from someone a second time could potentially send them out for blood, causing XR to need to resort to desperate measures again, resulting in a vicious cycle that never ended and an ongoing nightmare that would persist for the rest of his considerably shortened lifespan until someone killed him or he couldn't take it anymore and killed himself or he just dropped dead from nerves or got fired and sent to jail or AAH! STOP! JUST STOP!
He clutched at his helmet. The guy raised one eyebrow at him.
"What?" he squeaked. "Nothing wrong here."
He tried to squeeze out another grin... no can do, pardner.
The guy shook his head slightly and dropped his eyes to the dessert menu.
XR swallowed. "So, uh."
"I don't do small talk."
Well, that did it for that little issue.
XR clasped his hands together in front of him, frowning. "So, ah. I... guess our business is done."
"Stay. I have a few things I wanna say to you."
"Oh." He swallowed again. "S-such as?"
"One... you're paying for lunch."
"Of course I am," XR said dismally.
"Two... you don't call me again. You don't call, you don't email, you don't say anything to me unless I say you can. You don't do so much as take a crap without my say-so, capische?"
XR nodded, then before he could stop himself he blurted out "You know, I'm a robot, I don't take-"
"And you don't be a wise-aleck," the thug said, pointing at him.
XR nodded. Whyyy, a little voice in the back of his mind sobbed. He ignored it.
"Sclurf steak," a voice chimed behind him. He jumped and pawed at his chest, crying out.
It was the waitress. XR collapsed in his seat.
"Oh hi," he said.
The waitress raised one eyebrow at him.
"Is... everything okay, sir?"
No. "Oh, yeah. Definitely. I'm great," he said, flashing the 'OK' sign at her.
"Okay then," the waitress said, setting the thug's meal on the table. It smelled very fishy. Very very fishy.
"Anything else I can get you guys?" she asked, smiling.
get me out of here
"No," he said, forcing a smile. His face was starting to hurt.
The waitress left.
"And don't do that," the thug growled.
"Do what?" he asked.
"Act like you're sitting across from a bad guy. Because you're not sitting across from a bad guy," the thug said, raising one eyebrow. "I'm a nice guy."
"Sure you are," XR said.
"Now you're getting it."
The thug dug into his fish steak.
"Anything else I should know?"
"Yes. Don't become a liability."
"Or?" he prompted.
The thug gave him a disparaging look. "This is the protection my tax dollars are paying for?" he snapped. "What do you think?" He lowered his voice. "If I think you might talk, I'll have to kill you, you idiot."
"Oh." XR ran his tongue over his lips. "Well, in that case I think I'd deserve a refund. Aaahahahaa."
"I might kill you anyway."
He swallowed. "Please don't."
The thug continued to (irritatingly slowly) eat his Sclurf steak. XR drummed his fingers on the table.
"And don't drum your fingers on the table."
XR scowled. Man, what a jerk. "Sir, I recommend changing your tone or I just might find myself another thug," he snapped.
"Go ahead. It makes no difference to me."
XR pouted down at the surface of the table. The guy was making things unnecessarily hard for him, he thought.
There was a silence. Well, not real silent, XR could hear plenty of babbling from other tables. It ground on his nerves.
How had he been reduced to this? he wondered, closing his eyes. Making deals with the criminal element... and whatever Kila had been... if anyone found out, oh man. He could count on working in a warehouse for the rest of his life. His much shorter life, because apparently this guy was gonna kill him. Shoot.
Tears pricked at his eyes. He forced them away. He'd gotten better at that recently, it seemed.
The rest of the visit dragged on slowly and painfully. XR huddled in his seat with his eyes closed for most of it. Finally, the waitress showed up with the check.
XR stared at it in disbelief for a moment.
"Problem?" the thug asked.
Problem? XR thought. Problem? Do you guys think I'm made of money? Do you think I'm your service drone? Do you think I have nothing better to do than let myself get pushed around all day?
He clenched his hands at his sides and said "Oh, heh, no, no problem."
And he paid the bill.

1:47 PM

He pushed his way out onto the sidewalk outside the restaurant with a grateful sigh. Oh, so much better. It was nice and cool out here. He made his way over to a nearby bench and sat down on it with a slight whimper. He'd just sit here for a moment and get his bearings.
XR leaned back, closing his eyes. Well, that had been an ordeal. Thank goodness that was over. Now, next order of business: get fifty thousand Unibucks. Ah, craters.
He shuddered. A car blew past next to him and he whipped around, staring. No, nothing sinister, just a normal city car.
"Sunday driver!" he snapped. A nearby pedestrian gave him a strange look. He stuck his tongue out at her and she hurried away, wrapping her arms a little tighter around the baby she was holding. He rolled his eyes and slumped back in his seat.
Fifty thousand Unibucks. Oh sweet mother of Venus. Within a week.
Why did I say yes? Why? WHY? Oh man.
"XR?"
He jumped. Oh no.
Why hadn't he remembered his team was scheduled to do a patrol of Tradeworld today?
"I thought you were too sick to come to work," Mira said, approaching him. Craters.
"Hmm?" he said, looking up at her. "Oh, I am. I just... came out here to... get some medicine."
"Robots don't take medicine," she said, raising one eyebrow.
"Well, I was speaking figuratively, it's really a CD with a virus fix on it," he said, looking away. Something inside him flipped over and he trembled.
"And you can't get that from the LGMs why?" she asked, raising her eyebrows.
"Well, they asked me to get it for them to save work," he said, aimlessly twiddling his fingers together.
"But... you're sick... and they're not," Mira said, raising her eyebrows. "That's not very nice, is it?"
"Well, you'd have to tell them that," XR shrugged.
"Mm," she said. "So, uh, what are you really up to?"
"I just told you," he snapped.
Mira nodded, her lips pressed together tightly. "Okay then. Well, I'll get back to work then."
She began to walk away. XR watched for a minute, then called "You're not gonna tell Buzz, are you?"
She slowed for a minute, then sped up without speaking.
XR frowned down at the ground. Well that was lovely. Wonderful. Not even giving him the time of day. That was just-
His body stiffened for a moment, then he made a dash for the gutter. His helmet whooshed back and he hit his hands and knees, retching violently.
After a minute, XR stood up, moaning and clutching his waist. His head was throbbing.
The foot traffic passed by him on either side. No one appeared to have noticed him at all.
He shook his head. Hooray for Tradeworld.

2:58 PM

He had a good two hours before Booster got off work. Great.
XR thoroughly checked the room, the doorway and himself for signs he'd been out, then he sat down on the couch, looking down at the floor. The earliest Booster could possibly get here was 4:30, so he had more like an hour and a half... he wanted to be lying on the couch looking sick and pathetic when Booster came in, that way Booster would think he'd been here all day. Until then, he could... what? What could he do in an hour and a half?
He blinked down at the floor. He felt sore all over. What did he need to do? Nothing. He'd already done all the work he had to do today
all alone here
XR got up from the couch and went to the door. He locked it, bolted it, fastened the little chain thingy, then stood there rubbing the lower half of his helmet with his index finger and tapping his foot. No, no. Not a good idea. Really it wasn't. He wasn't so paranoid that he had to-
Oh screw it. Yes he was. He bolted into the kitchen, got a small chair, went back to the door and stuck the chair in front of it. There, Mr. Paranoid, ya happy now? mm... no, he wasn't happy.
He got another chair. Then another one. Then he went through the apartment, checking every window to make sure it was shaded. One of the shades looked kinda thin and see-through so he duct-taped it up real good.
Then he plunked down on the couch with a sigh. There. He was safe, right? Right?
There was a tiny noise form somewhere inside the apartment and he sat bolt upright, hugging his knees to his chest and trembling all over, like a beaten puppy.
After a few minutes there was no further sound and he relaxed slightly. Only slightly. What time was it? He looked up at the clock. 3:34. He'd spent half an hour barricading himself in. So of course, he'd have to start dismantling in a few minutes, so Booster wouldn't come home and find XR had turned his home into a fort.
XR nodded at the ground. Yeah, he'd get to work on that in a few minutes here. In the meantime, boy, did he feel wiped out. Maybe he'd watch a little TV.
But if he turned on the set he wouldn't be able to listen out for someone approaching. Oh, come on. He wasn't that worried, was he?
He chuckled out loud to himself. Somewhere in the middle the chuckle turned into a sob. No, he wasn't worried at all. He was scared.
All right, he told himself, the paranoia was getting ridiculous. He was going to turn on the TV, watch the TV for a little while, pick up that stupid barricade, plug into the wall and curl up under a blanket waiting for Booster to- you know, that sounded like a lot of work.
He sighed and leaned back into the cushions. He'd just, you know, take five first. Wait for himself to stop feeling so jumpy.
He closed his eyes.

5:14 PM

There was a banging noise and he didn't register what it was at first, only that it made his head hurt and he burrowed into the cushions, hearing himself whimper softly. The banging came again and this time there was a voice, too, a frantic voice. Calling his name.
Go away, I'm off duty.
The room was warm and stuffy and everything hurt. He shuddered.
Voice again. Booster. "Are you in there?"
"Yeah, I'm..." he heard himself slur and then he remembered about the barricade.
"Yeah, I'm in there, hold your horses," he called, or mumbled, sitting up and staggering to his feet. It made his head lurch around and he moaned.
He pulled the chairs away from the door, fumbled at the locks until some of them came off, and leaned against the wall, closing his eyes. He felt too-warm and... somehow muggy.
The door opened and he heard Booster call his name again.
"Mm hmm," he said, just as kind of a blanket response (ow my head) and then Booster picked up him and set him back down on the couch. That was where he wanted to be, right? Yeah, probably.
He curled up on his side. Booster was saying something about... something warm. Sounded upset. Yeah, whatever.

As you can see, things got a little boring.

Chapter 12 http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4326397/12/City_Traffic_Puzzle

~~~Songs/Quotes~~~

B-MOVIIIEEEE

with some homestaaaaw.

~~~References~~~

"Look. Kayla-"

She leapt to her feet atop the chair. "THAT'S NOT MY NAME!"

The ashtray fell off the desk and shattered. Buzz jumped.

-snrk- That's another Stephen King reference. There's a similar scene in Carrie. In Carrie the ashtray falling off the desk is a sign of Carrie's budding telekinesis. Here it's just because Kila jumped on the chair and jolted the desk.

"Hoh- ha- h-hi," he stammered.

...Stitch. XD

A new face appeared above his helmet. He blinked. This creature was blueish-green, scaly and giving him a wicked leer comprised of interlocking sharp teeth. It had deep pinkish-red compound eyes and it was making nasty little chuckling sounds. It also had antennae, long black ones with thick, tapering blades on the ends.

"Oh, that's it?" XR couldn't help but say. It just looked like your typical insectoid/reptilian species.

Zekk is based on the midget from this Dr. McNinja issue.

I love Dr. McNinja.

Actually, Zekk is a double reference... this isn't the first time I've used that name.

~~~Deleted Scenes~~~

Originally, an alternate set of events continued from the alternate, successful meeting at Serdik's...

Rains on in the city traffic puzzle
Shifting pieces, just like my stomach
We're both so upset
Lovesick and sick of it
We're both on the same page but don't feel the same way
~The Hush Sound, 'City Traffic Puzzle'

10/12/02

6:12 AM

XR resisted waking up for a long time, huddling on the couch with the blanket pulled over his head, but he had to finally concede that he was too achy and uncomfortable to go back to sleep and he stood up carefully, stretching the kinks out of his cables.
He glanced dully around the room. The shades were still down, the way he fuzzily remembered putting them yesterday afternoon. He ambled down the hallway and into the bathroom.
Fumbling the small step-stool Booster kept in there in front of the sink (he told himself Booster kept the stool in case he was babysitting or something but he knew it was really for him) he crawled on top of it to look into the bathroom mirror.
His eyes looked too big and his face looked too small and thin. Did he always look this bug-eyed?... yeah, probably.
He huddled there shivering for a moment (his mind had gone completely blank) and then he staggered back in the direction of the couch. He'd intended to wash up for the day (his face felt warm and sticky and had lost its shine) but he was too unmotivated.
XR crawled back onto the couch, wrapping himself up in the blanket. He could hear Booster moving around in the kitchen.
Hot tears of self-pity welled up in his eyes. He'd never been this sick in his entire life of... just over two years and two months. Oh man. He'd need the day off. Maybe the week off. What if he died? His eyes widened. Could he die? What did he have?
He tried to think of computer viruses he'd heard were going around lately and came up blank. Maybe because Star Command had a rather small robotic community that he never really communed with in the first place. Or maybe his brain chip had gotten scrambled and he was losing important memories!
He tried to remember what his mother's face looked like AAH HE WAS SLOWLY GOING MAD AND IN A FEW WEEKS, NAY DAYS, NAY HOURS HE'D BE REDUCED TO A GIBBERING MORON AND THEN EVEN THE GIBBERING-MORON FILES WOULD GO AND HE'D BE DEAD wait, he couldn't remember what his mother looked like because he didn't have a mother. HE'D FORGOTTEN HE DIDN'T HAVE A MOTHER, OH SWEET MOTHER OF VENUS
"Two plus two is-" he said aloud, then narrowed his eyes and gnawed on his lower lip. "F- f- f- f- ten. IN BASE TEN, I'M FINE!"
"XR?" Booster said, sticking his head into the doorway between the hallway and living room. His eyes were wide and scared.
"Nothing, nothing," XR said, shaking his head.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm fine," he whimpered. Oh golly, his head hurt.
"You don't look good," Booster said, his eyes wide.
I'm dying by inches, he wanted to say but didn't. "I just need to talk to the LGMs," he said.
"Okay," Booster said, nodding, though his eyes were dark with worry. "Do you need anything?"
XR shook his head and wrapped the blanket a little tighter around himself. Booster nodded and retreated into the kitchen.

7:28 AM

Booster cast a worried glance at the passenger seat beside him. XR was sitting there looking limp and somehow wilted, like a bird that had connected with a glass door. He was gazing out of the window without really seeing what was out there. He trembled every so often and occasionally made a rather irritating scraping-metal sound, probably his version of a cough.
"You okay?" Booster asked for the second time and he nodded slightly, closing his eyes.
Booster looked back out of the windshield, blinking. He was a naturally careful driver, and worry for his friend made this more pronounced.
"You sure?" he said.
"Yeah, yeah, 'm sure," XR mumbled. Booster frowned. It wasn't like XR to mumble. He was usually all chatty.
The silence hung heavily in the air. Booster nibbled his lower lip.
"It's nice out today," he said. XR didn't reply.
They were heading into the atmosphere now.
"Do you mind if I turn on the radio?" Booster said. XR shook his head slowly and Booster reached out and tuned it to a country station. 'Delta Dawn' was playing.
XR's eyes got big and he wrung his hands.
"What's wrong?"
"I really, really don't like this song. Can you change it, please?"
Booster shrugged and changed it to Christian contemporary.
XR turned to look out the window with his eyes glazed over.
Booster's communicator beeped. He glanced over at XR, then carefully pulled over and answered it.
It was Buzz. His eyes were wide and intense. Booster blinked.
"Booster! Where are you?"
"I'm heading into work," he said. "Why? Is something wrong?"
"Something big's going down on Tradeworld." XR sat up ramrod-straight. "Right now. Head straight here."
"Oh, okay," Booster said, then he bit his lip. "Oh, but-"
XR suddenly grabbed his wrist. "Ow!"
"What's going down?" XR said, his eyes popping.
"We have a lead on a well-known crime boss."
"WHO?"
Buzz frowned. "Is something-"
He shook Booster's wrist ("Ow! XR!")"Just tell me who it is!"
Buzz raised an eyebrow. "A Marian Ver-"
XR slammed the communicator shut.
Booster stared at him.
"Booster, listen. If you love me," he stated, "you will drive me to the border of the Galactic Federation and leave me there. And never ever ever tell anyone where I am ever."
"What? Why?"
"And again, if you love me, if you love me at all, you will not ask questions."

Originally, this was going to lead to an epic showdown with Marian, and XR was going to shoot him. ...Yeah.

I couldn't for the life of me get that scene to work, so we have our current ending.

Chapter 13 (Epilogue) http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4326397/13/City_Traffic_Puzzle

~~~Songs/Quotes~~~

Lilo & Stitch, obviously.

~~~References~~~

"That's right! You, A-Tyrma, are going to make that girl into a model citizen!"

"M-model- citizen?" he stammered.

"You're gonna teach her right from wrong, you're gonna reform her! And if you can't-" He stood, his eyes narrowing. "It's curtains for you."
...
XR scrambled out of the room. Two months. Model citizen.

Oh, sweet mother of Venus.

Guess. Just... guess. I dare you. It's so *very subtle* of me.

But yeah, this is a bit of a parallel to the events of Lilo & Stitch. With XR in the 'role' of Lilo and Kila as Stitch.


Well, that's it for now... see y'alls for the next story in the series, I Palindrome I.

mood: accomplished tags: both syllables series, buzz lightyear of star command, city traffic puzzle, story extras